Daily Decrees

Beginning January 1, 2011, your all powerful yet benevolent despot will make one decree daily that will become instant and unquestionable law. Though it is said that absolute power corrupts absolutely, it is yet unkown whether absolute imagined power corrupts. Perhaps it merely corrupts the imagination. We'll find out as Marisa, the newly ordained Queen of the World, attempts to change the world for the better by making 365 unilateral decisions. Ultimately though, it doesn't really matter whether you agree with her decisions or not. So feel free to comment as long as you understand your comments are in vain. In all honesty though your queen is hopeful that you will consider the vast majority of her decrees to be the kind of decisions you wish your previous leaders had made years ago. The best part of being the supreme ruler of the world is that changes can be made easily. There are no agreements to be reached, no protocols to follow, and no bureaucratic red tape...and that is the whole point.

Saturday, February 5, 2011

February 5, 2011 – The Struggle for Soda

At 5’2”, I am far from tall; but I don’t consider myself outside of the normal range of height.  Still, there are times when I consider my height to be a great disadvantage, and often it is due to needless circumstances.  I have a few things planned to make life a little fairer for those of us who are vertically challenged but today, after a very frustrating trip to my local grocery store, I will focus on making shopping easier and safer.
If you’ve ever had to boost yourself on a lower shelf to reach products on an upper shelf you know how frustrating and dangerous it can be to try and get something that is out of reach above your head.  It’s one thing when stores put overstocks on high shelves, but I will never understand why many stores, especially supermarkets, place rather heavy items on shelves that are over 6’ tall.  For me it’s the soda aisle that is the worst.  A 2-liter soda bottle weighs about 4.4 lbs.  Sure that’s not heavy per se, but it’s heavy enough that it would really hurt if it were to fall in the course of your efforts to remove it from the shelf.  For some reason supermarkets love to stock 2-liter bottles on the very top shelf with guard rails that make it so you have to lift the bottle up and out.  Granted I can manage when I go shopping, but it’s a needless difficulty that I don’t think I should need to deal with.
Stores may not place items heavier than two pounds on shelves higher than five feet.
Let’s just be logical about things.  It is easier for a tall person to reach a low shelf than for a short person to reach a high shelf, so why not focus on making things reachable for shorter people?  Hey, it’s not so selfish.  I could just say that stores have to make sure that I can reach all of their items; although that doesn’t sound like a bad idea.  If there is a downside to stocking items on lower shelves please let me know.  Otherwise, from now on I expect to be able to go food shopping without having to boost myself on lower shelves or move heavy items above my head with outstretched fingertips. 
As always I remain your all-powerful and benevolent Queen of the World,
Marisa
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